Fantastic, now I have to talk about the bleeding-heart Pisces. These overly emotional crybabies are born between February 19 and March 20, and they’re ruled by Neptune, the planet of dreams, illusions, and everything that makes life a blurry, emotional mess.

Pisces are the zodiac’s ultimate escapist artists. They love nothing more than to bury their heads in the sand and pretend everything is just hunky-dory. They’re so out of touch with reality that it’s a wonder they ever manage to get anything done. But don’t worry, they’ll find a way to remind you that they’re the “creative” ones, as if that’s some kind of excuse for their constant daydreaming.

These water signs are known for their empathy and compassion, but they take it to a whole new level of annoying. They’re so damn sensitive that the slightest thing can send them spiraling into a fit of tears. They’re like walking emotional minefields, and the rest of us have to tiptoe around them, trying not to set them off.

Pisces are notorious for their terrible decision-making skills, often letting their hearts rule their heads. They’ll dive headfirst into doomed relationships and ill-advised business ventures, only to come crawling back, begging for help when it all inevitably goes tits up.

In 2023, Pisces can expect more of the same. They’ll continue to live in their little fantasy worlds, avoiding reality like the plague. Meanwhile, the rest of us will be left to pick up the pieces when their fragile little hearts inevitably get broken again.

So there you have it, the exhausting, maddening, and utterly insufferable world of Pisces. Now, can we please move on to something less infuriating? I’ve got better things to do with my time than pander to these emotional train wrecks.